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For the non-Hebrew speakers, this is roughly what written here:
In case that this apartment receives a direct hit (from a rocket):
Police and Army people: calm down, were at my parents
Property Tax People: this apartment once contained plasma screen TV, a bottle of Bordeaux harvested at 1706 and a very rare, antique porcelain sculpture.
Cable Company People: The plasma screen TV was used as a flowerpot.
Rutie: If we got hit, we are not paying you the "house utilities" fee.
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